Sunday, May 10, 2015

Melalot

Bismilahirrahmannirrahim...

I am already 25 now...
Even now, i still can't find my happiness. I want to jump off from this type of life. I would like to experience something different from what have I experience. What is it? I feel empty inside. Things that i cant even describe. Things that cant even be filled up by friends or family. Is it related to my career life or my love life? Can i say, i want both? Hee...

Activities...
Holidays, travels, friends, all this are not long lasting. They may wear off someday. Like my trip to Krabi, a week after that, i long for it again. Like my friend had told me, all this would not satisfied our thirst, until we found the one that we trully need. Insyaallah... Allah may lead us to the right path. I am still learning to become a better muslimah.

Oh my heart...
Lately I keep watch korean drama. Only this can keep me feels alive. I am not able to experience such love, what can i do is just keep watching kdrama to feed my emptiness.. Haha... Sad

Sometimes...
I kept remembering them. Those who used to shake my heart. I wonder, if i remember them, would they remembered me as well? I dont think so. But i wish, they would. So now, lets move forward. No need to think about the past. Past is past. Let bygone be bygone. Lets strive to the future. Lets find my soulmate.. Haha...

Soulmate...
Where can i find him? How can i find him? When can i meet him? I've tried to look for a life partner. But all seems like a waste efford. I can't manage to meet them pon. Y? Because i am not the type to date anyone whom i just met. Mm... Not those i just met, my old friend pon i seldom agreed to meet. Ugh... I do not dare to go out with any man. That's my biggest problem. Haha... My friend said how can i find my soulmate if i dont dare to meet anyone of them? Ya laa.... How? I can get out with my girl friends but not a boy friends. I think its my phobia. I always find excuses if someone ask me out. Aishh.. Can we just be friend without see each other? Can we? Just know each other without see face to face. I hate the fact that we need to meet up then we can get official. I hate those. To me its like, you will like me depends on my face. I always feels inferior when people see my face. I think people will think I'm ugly. Besides, my teeth is not perfect as well. I always nervous when people look at me..then, sweating... Thats most the most thing i hate. Hahaaa....

Ok la.. Enough with my melalot.
Assalamualaikum...

End

p/s: may Allah show me my soulmate asap so i wont feel empty, i can get a triplet baby, i can go travel every week without needs to find a travel buddy and i can talk about anything, everything anytime anywhere. I hope he is korean look.. Hahahaaaaaaaaaa

posted from Bloggeroid

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